Studying

Studying is a very simple concept right!?! Yes it is, but it also takes some dedication and a heck of a lot of keeping focused and keeping on track. It is so important that we study, in order to get the results that we want. And if we don’t want better results than we don’t study. In order to get good grades in class, we must apply ourselves, focus on what we are doing, and make sure that we are directly connected to what we are doing.

It is so simple, yet sometimes we will become complacent and that isn’t good for us. We need to do the very best that we can in whatever we are doing. One thing that I have noticed here lately is that it takes a lot more than just to show up for a class. It takes involvement in that class also. We must participate in what we are doing in order for whatever we are studying to become very effective. Now this concept isn’t knew to us, yet it is like a God Shot to someone such as myself.

I have been in recovery for quite sometime now. However even with the time that I have in, I have not participated too much in my recovery, nor have I even studied that much in order to get the results that I would like to have. I suppose a guy would even say that I have pretty much just rested on my morals, if in fact I even had any to begin with. So I come up with the conclusion that we need to get back to the basics. And what are the basics of studying.

First thing is to show up on time. We can not be late for class because there are consequences for being late, or tardy if you remember. And if you get too many of them than you can get suspended and than if that happens you are going to be missing out on a lot of things from the class that you will probably end up failing. So showing up on time is very important.

Now in class we have to also pay attention to the teacher. That being said, if you are in Recovery, the teacher can be a lot of different things. I know many will automatically go into the Sponsor, God stuff, etc. but there are other teachers such as just friends, maybe your partner, books, literature, Forums sites that have a whole lot of Resources and things of the such. These things are all teachers and if we are paying attention to it than we are off to a wonderful start.

Now usually during class, when the teacher is teaching, most of us have used what we know as taking notes. Now as far as the notes are concerned, that is pretty much the same as journalism. Now if you go to most websites that are used for recovery they or most of them have journal forums in them so you are able post and most of the Internet world are not able to see them unless they are members of that Forum so that is a good way to express yourself and to be able to take note so to speak.

Than when all is said and done, once we have commensed this way of life, we than are ready to take the test. The test in recovery and being able to pass the test is to learn how to live life without the use of using. To put into action the things that we are taught by all the process above and to score on that test so to speak. The score depends on how well we follow the directions and how well we have listened throughout sessions. That my friends is Studying to this addict.

Thanks for allowing me to share.

Sleeping Is Healthy

Finally got a decent night sleep in almost 4 weeks of being in Lincoln.

Sleeping isn’t easy for me. Most of my lack of sleeping is caused from my drug use during my life. But when I am able to get a good night sleep it feels really good I am glad that I finally was able to get a good nights rest! Sometimes I think that has a lot to do with my recovery as well. They talk a lot about the H.A.L.T.S. (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, Sick) part in the rooms of AA/NA and I am sure that it has a lot to do with relapse. I get most of those quite a bit, maybe I should pay more attention to that little check list.

I woke up earlier and did my postings on the server for the meditations for the day. That was a good thing around 3 or 4am and than I went back to bed. But let us get back to the topic at hand. Sleeping is Healthy.

Most of us don’t realize how important it is to have a good night sleep. It is very important to be well rested. It helps us through out the day to be able to function in a healthy manner and I also believe that it helps us to react to situations in a much healthier manner as well. Without having a good nights rest and having those nights build up into weeks without a good nights rest, we tend to be on the edge more with our attitude, and not only with our attitude but on dealing with issues that may arise. So it is important in so many aspects to have a healthy sleeping schedule.

Now I am not one for the use of aids, however if you need a sleeping pill to help you get that nights rest, than by all means get in touch with your Doctor and talk it over with him/her. I know that you can by those things over the counter, however with alkies/addicts it isn’t a good thing to start going to the local drug store and just prescribing yourself medications without first talking it over with a Doctor. Now that is just my own opinion and you can take it or leave it. But I only know from my own experience that it isn’t best for me to start playing Doctor again, I have been down that road too many times and it always leads to other things which are not healthy.

Here are some tips that might help you out

Here are some Tips that may help.

• Sleep is as important as food and air. Quantity and quality are very important. Most adults need between 7.5 to 8.5 hours of uninterrupted sleep. If you press the snooze button on the alarm in the morning you are not getting enough sleep. This could be due to not enough time in bed, external disturbances, or a sleep disorder.
• Keep regular hours. Try to go to bed at the same time and get up at the same time every day. Getting up at the same time is most important. Getting bright light, like the sun, when you get up will also help. Try to go to bed only when you are sleepy. Bright light in the morning at a regular time should help you feel sleepy at the same time every night.
• Stay away from stimulants like caffeine. This will help you get deep sleep which is most refreshing. If you take any caffeine, take it in the morning. Avoid all stimulants in the evening, including chocolate, caffeinated sodas, and caffeinated teas. They will delay sleep and increase arousals during the night.
• Use the bed for sleeping. Avoid watching TV or using laptop computers. Know that reading in bed can be a problem if the material is very stimulation and you read with a bright light. If it helps to read before sleep make sure you use a very small wattage bulb to read. A 15 watt bulb should be enough. Bright light from these activities may inhibit sleep.
• Avoid bright light around the house before bed. Using dimmer switches in living rooms and bathrooms before bed can be helpful. (Dimmer switches can be set to maximum brightness for morning routines.)
• Don’t stress if you feel you are not getting enough sleep. It will just make matters worse. Know you will sleep eventually.
• Avoid exercise near bedtime. No exercise at least 3 hours before bed.
• Don’t go to bed hungry. Have a light snack, avoid a heavy meal before bed.
• Bedtime routines are helpful for good sleep. Keep routines on your normal schedule. A cup of herbal tea an hour before bed can begin a routine.
• Avoid looking at the clock if you wake up in the middle of the night. It can cause anxiety. This is very difficult for most of us, so turn the clock away from your eyes so you would have to turn it to see the time. You may decide not to make the effort and go right back to sleep.
• If you can’t get to sleep for over 30 minutes, get out of bed and do something boring in dim light till you are sleepy.
• Keep your bedroom at comfortable temperature. Not too warm and not too cold. Cooler is better than warmer.
• If you have problems with noise in your environment you can use a white noise generator. A old fan will work or you can buy noise machies from many sources.
• Know that the “night cap” has a price. Alcohol may help you to get to sleep but it will cause you to wake up throughout the night. You may not notice it. (It is worse if you have sleep apnea because the alcohol makes the apnea worse.) Sometimes people snore only if they have had some alcohol or may snore worse if they already snore.)
• If you have a sleeping partner, ask them if they notice any snoring, leg movements and/or pauses in breathing . Take this information and try the sleep test. You may have a sleep disorder or you may just need to increase your awareness about your own sleep need. If you have any concerns see your doctor.

What Are Substance Abuse and Addiction?

The difference between substance abuse and addiction is very slight. Substance abuse means using an illegal substance or using a legal substance in the wrong way. Addiction begins as abuse, or using a substance like marijuana or cocaine. You can abuse a drug (or alcohol) without having an addiction. For example, just because Sara smoked weed a few times doesn't mean that she has an addiction, but it does mean that she's abusing a drug — and that could lead to an addiction.

People can get addicted to all sorts of substances. When we think of addiction, we usually think of alcohol or illegal drugs. But people become addicted to medications, cigarettes, even glue! And some substances are more addictive than others: Drugs like crack or heroin are so addictive that they might only be used once or twice before the user loses control.

Addiction means a person has no control over whether he or she uses a drug or drinks. Someone who's addicted to cocaine has grown so used to the drug that he or she has to have it. Addiction can be physical, psychological, or both.

Physical addiction is when a person's body actually becomes dependent on a particular substance (even smoking is physically addictive). It also means building tolerance to that substance, so that a person needs a larger dose than ever before to get the same effects. Someone who is physically addicted and stops using a substance like drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes may experience withdrawal symptoms. Common symptoms of withdrawal are diarrhea, shaking, and generally feeling awful.

Psychological addiction happens when the cravings for a drug are psychological or emotional. People who are psychologically addicted feel overcome by the desire to have a drug. They may lie or steal to get it.

A person crosses the line between abuse and addiction when he or she is no longer trying the drug to have fun or get high, but has come to depend on it. His or her whole life centers around the need for the drug. An addicted person — whether it's a physical or psychological addiction or both — no longer feels like there is a choice in taking a substance.

Info Facts: Crack And Cocaine

Cocaine is a powerfully addictive stimulant drug. The powdered, hydrochloride salt form of cocaine can be snorted or dissolved in water and injected. Crack is cocaine that has not been neutralized by an acid to make the hydrochloride salt. This form of cocaine comes in a rock crystal that can be heated and its vapors smoked. The term "crack" refers to the crackling sound heard when it is heated.*

Regardless of how cocaine is used or how frequently, a user can experience acute cardiovascular or cerebrovascular emergencies, such as a heart attack or stroke, which could result in sudden death. Cocaine-related deaths are often a result of cardiac arrest or seizure followed by respiratory arrest.

Health Hazards

Cocaine is a strong central nervous system stimulant that interferes with the reabsorption process of dopamine, a chemical messenger associated with pleasure and movement. The buildup of dopamine causes continuous stimulation of receiving neurons, which is associated with the euphoria commonly reported by cocaine abusers.

Physical effects of cocaine use include constricted blood vessels, dilated pupils, and increased temperature, heart rate, and blood pressure. The duration of cocaine's immediate euphoric effects, which include hyperstimulation, reduced fatigue, and mental alertness, depends on the route of administration. The faster the absorption, the more intense the high. On the other hand, the faster the absorption, the shorter the duration of action. The high from snorting may last 15 to 30 minutes, while that from smoking may last 5 to 10 minutes. Increased use can reduce the period of time a user feels high and increases the risk of addiction.

Some users of cocaine report feelings of restlessness, irritability, and anxiety. A tolerance to the "high" may develop—many addicts report that they seek but fail to achieve as much pleasure as they did from their first exposure. Some users will increase their doses to intensify and prolong the euphoric effects. While tolerance to the high can occur, users can also become more sensitive to cocaine's anesthetic and convulsant effects without increasing the dose taken. This increased sensitivity may explain some deaths occurring after apparently low doses of cocaine.

Use of cocaine in a binge, during which the drug is taken repeatedly and at increasingly high doses, may lead to a state of increasing irritability, restlessness, and paranoia. This can result in a period of full-blown paranoid psychosis, in which the user loses touch with reality and experiences auditory hallucinations.

Other complications associated with cocaine use include disturbances in heart rhythm and heart attacks, chest pain and respiratory failure, strokes, seizures and headaches, and gastrointestinal complications such as abdominal pain and nausea. Because cocaine has a tendency to decrease appetite, many chronic users can become malnourished.

Different means of taking cocaine can produce different adverse effects. Regularly snorting cocaine, for example, can lead to loss of the sense of smell, nosebleeds, problems with swallowing, hoarseness, and a chronically runny nose. Ingesting cocaine can cause severe bowel gangrene due to reduced blood flow. People who inject cocaine can experience severe allergic reactions and, as with all injecting drug users, are at increased risk for contracting HIV and other blood-borne diseases.

Added Danger: Cocaethylene
When people mix cocaine and alcohol consumption, they are compounding the danger each drug poses and unknowingly forming a complex chemical experiment within their bodies. NIDA-funded researchers have found that the human liver combines cocaine and alcohol and manufactures a third substance, cocaethylene, that intensifies cocaine's euphoric effects, while potentially increasing the risk of sudden death.

Treatment

The widespread abuse of cocaine has stimulated extensive efforts to develop treatment programs for this type of drug abuse.

One of NIDA's top research priorities is to find a medication to block or greatly reduce the effects of cocaine, to be used as one part of a comprehensive treatment program. NIDA-funded researchers are also looking at medications that help alleviate the severe craving that people in treatment for cocaine addiction often experience. Several medications are currently being investigated for their safety and efficacy in treating cocaine addiction.

In addition to treatment medications, behavioral interventions—particularly cognitive behavioral therapy—can be effective in decreasing drug use by patients in treatment for cocaine abuse. Providing the optimal combination of treatment and services for each individual is critical to successful outcomes.

Extent of Use

Monitoring the Future (MTF) Survey **
Lifetime,*** annual, and 30-day cocaine use remained stable among all three grades in 2005. Perceived harmfulness of occasional use also remained stable in 2005, measuring at 65.3 percent among 8th-graders, 72.4 percent among 10th-graders, and 60.8 percent among 12th-graders.

Use of Cocaine in Any Form by Students, 2005:
Monitoring the Future Survey

8th-Graders 10th-Graders 12th-Graders Lifetime 3.7% 5.2% 8.0% Annual 2.2 3.5 5.1 30-Day 1.0 1.5 2.3

Crack Cocaine Use by Students, 2005:
Monitoring the Future Survey

8th-Graders 10th-Graders 12th-Graders Lifetime 2.4% 2.5% 3.5% Annual 1.4 1.7 1.9 30-Day 0.6 0.7 1.0

Community Epidemiology Work Group (CEWG)****
Cocaine-related death mentions in 2003 were particularly high in New York City/Newark, Detroit, Boston, and Baltimore, as measured by one Federal data source. Reports from local medical examiner data named Texas and Philadelphia as sites with the highest rates of cocaine-related deaths from 2003 through 2004.

Primary cocaine treatment admissions in 2004 accounted for 52.5 percent of treatment admissions, excluding alcohol, in Atlanta, 38.9 percent in New Orleans, and approximately 36 percent in Texas and Detroit.

National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH)*****
In 2004, 34.2 million Americans aged 12 and over reported lifetime use of cocaine, and 7.8 million reported using crack. About 5.6 million reported annual use of cocaine, and 1.3 million reported using crack. An estimated 2 million Americans reported current use of cocaine, 467,000 of whom reported using crack. There were an estimated 1 million new users of cocaine in 2004 (approximately 2,700 per day), and most were aged 18 or older although the average age of first use was 20.0 years.

The percentage of youth ages 12 to 17 reporting lifetime use of cocaine was 2.4 percent in 2004. Among young adults aged 18 to 25, the rate was 15.2 percent, showing no significant difference from the previous year. However, there was a statistically significant decrease in perceived risk of using cocaine once a month among Americans in the 12 to 17 age bracket in 2004.

Past month crack use was down for 16- or 17-year-olds but up for 21- to 25-year-olds; 21-year-olds also showed increases in past year use of both crack and cocaine.

Past month use of cocaine was down among females aged 12–17 and Asians 12 or older, but up among Blacks aged 18 to 25. There was a decrease in past year cocaine use measured among Asians aged 18 to 25.

Following a decline between 2002 and 2003, NSDUH data show an increase in the number of people receiving treatment for a cocaine use problem during their most recent treatment at a specialty facility, from 276,000 in 2003 to 466,000 in 2004.

Addiction and the Brain

Addiction and the Brain

Scientists now know that addiction is the result of key changes in the brain.

For example, all drugs of abuse affect the dopamine pathway in the brain. Dopamine is a kind of neurotransmitter - a chemical produced by nerve cells that process and transmit information in the brain. The dopamine neurotransmitter's job is to produce feelings of pleasure so this pathway is commonly known as the "pleasure pathway."

"What happens when people develop a substance use disorder is that they tax the ability of their dopamine system to keep up," says Dr. Kathleen Brady, an addiction researcher at the Medical University of South Carolina. "The amount of dopamine we have in our brain is limited by the substances that the brain uses to make dopamine. And if we release it too often, we get into a situation where the brain has less dopamine. What that means is that an individual who has depleted their dopamine source in their brain has a difficult time feeling pleasure from even the normal events that would make someone happy - a mother seeing her child, or having a good meal."

The dopamine pathway is not the only part of the brain affected by addiction. Alcohol and drugs can profoundly affect different neurological circuits. Prolonged excessive alcohol use, for example, is believed to cause cause pervasive alterations in the brain's stressand stressand anti-stress systems. These changes, in and of themselves, may lead to additional compulsive drinking.

Drugs of abuse affect the parts of the brain that control pleasure, motivation, emotion, and memory, these changes can lead to the disease of drug addiction. Using drugs repeatedly over time changes brain structure and function in fundamental and long-lasting ways that can persist long after a person stops using them. Different types of drugs affect the brain in different ways, altering different aspects of the brain chemistry. However, with prolonged abstinence, some of the brain changes caused by specific drugs (e.g., methamphetamine) may be reversible, which is one reason why treatment is essential.

A Chronic Condition

Summary

• Like hypertension or diabetes, addiction is a lifelong illness.
• Biological and behavioral factors influence addiction, as they do other chronic conditions.
• Addiction can be effectively treated and managed through lifestyle changes and, in some cases, the use of medication.

For hundreds of years, people have considered addiction to be a problem of willpower or of moral failing. Now we know that addiction is a disorder much like other chronic illnesses that involve behavior and lifestyle. Some of these illnesses begin with voluntary behaviors, such as poor nutrition or failure to exercise. But then, biological changes occur in the body to make the illness a chronic condition.

Most people who have chronic conditions, even those who are working hard to stay on top of their illness, sometimes eat poorly or do other things that they know aren't healthy. They backslide, or relapse, at some point.

Other diseases like this include:

• hypertension (high blood pressure)
• adult onset (type 2) diabetes
• atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries)

These diseases are similar because they are:

• chronic
• influenced by biological and behavioral factors
• incurable, but can be effectively treated and managed

But in all of these illnesses, as in addiction, medications can be helpful, as can lifestyle changes, for getting better.

The Problem

So what exactly is the Problem? Or does that even need to be addressed? I believe that the problem should be addressed, however there is so many forms of the problem that it would be so hard to pinpoint it all into one area of any particular area of our lives that sometimes we will spend way too much time looking for what the problem is that we miss the solution to the problem. However we need to set up a blueprint if you will allow me to use this phrase for without a solid blueprint of a building you wouldn't have a solid building now would you? So we need to address the issue of what is the problem. That is a individual opinion and I am sure that there are many that will disagree with me here.

In my Own Experience I have came to believe that until we are sure of what the problem is there is no process to regain control over our addiction or over our addictive thinking which is my own opinion. I believe that we need to get down to the root and the cause of each of the addictions that are ailing us and than once we have opened up that door we will than be able to proceed to the next level of the recovery process.

Since the word addiction as we saw has what is now coincide with our minds and the way in which we react to the issues at hand it means that we have now discovered that we are not only physically, and mentally ill from the use of the substance, but it also processes some sort of bad vibes in the process also and this process never ceases until we do actually face the fact concerning the Problems that entail our everyday lives not just the days that we cleaned up from our main DOC (Drug Of Choice).

We start by recognizing our Problems with each other through our active drug use and being able to relate to the situation that got us there. This is the first part of the recovery phase that I like to call the truth has hit ya in the face but is that enough. Yeah the truth will set you free but only if you are willing to actually accept the truth for the truth. It is not just knowing the truth for knowing the truth and living the truth are two very different things. One may know that they have a sex issue, drug issue, gambling issue, but knowing it isn't anything unless we are willing to accept this to be the truth and once that is done than we are than able to move into another direction from what some would say is the denial stage of recovery into the active process of the recovery road.

I believe that I finally accepted the truth to the fact that crack, meth had me licked on May 25, 2006 and yet I had know the truth for many years before that. But until I could accept the fact that these substances was making a huge mess up in my life nothing seemed to happen very effectively in my recovery road. Although I had sometime being clean the the process wasn't the same than as it is now. I actually believe that it was easier to stay off of the stuff while I was actually only acknowledging my problem rather than accepting that it was my problem. You see there that is what I am saying that while it was actually only acknowledge the fact rather than accepting that it was the fact of my problems and the word was is also a key thing here because it isn't in fact a part of myself that is hurting my sound mind although it still does from the damage that I have caused to the brain cells all of these years.

The fact remains that those two substances I had to get out of my life, also with any other drug/alcohol to start the journey into the recovery field. Today I am still haunted by the addiction to Nicotine that sounds harmless but my story is still being told and this part of my addiction is still causing me insane and unsound mind decisions, although it would be a lot worse which we all would have to agree if I were still using those other substances PERIOD. So Now I have set up the problem as I had to search for within myself. Maybe you have the same problems or not, maybe it is Nicotine, Sex, Pot, Speed, Crack, Meth, Porno, whatever is causing this obsessive/compulsive behavior that is making the wrong choices than we identify that and move on to the next step in our recovery path toward freedom from our addiction to whatever addiction it is for you. As many of forms of addiction there are at least that many forms for recovery, I use multiple ways to recover and it works for me. Today

Recovery and Relapse inventory worksheet

Recovery and Relapse inventory worksheet

I have worked with a great many folks that have utilized teh swinging door. I have found the following to be very helpful in preventing the next relapse.

The instructions that were given to me when I found the worksheet were only that the person be encouraged to be thoroughly honest and willing to make changes. Those that have done the worksheet remain clean and sober. So I know it owrks…..and as the promises say..”if we work it”
I hope this will be helpful

Recovery and Relapse inventory worksheet

1) what fear did your relaps create?

2) what guilt did it bring?

3) what regret did it create?

4) what harm did you do to yourself?

5) what harm did you do to others?

6) what financial harm was done?

7) what relationship damage was done?

what did it do to your self esteem?

9) what damage was done to your relationship with God?

10) what other problems did your using create?

Read recovery and relapse every day for a month.

The chapter says a relapse means we are holding on to

Reservations.

11) what parts of the program are you not willing to trust?Can

you identify any reservations?

Often we find that our surrender only scratches the surface.Only

A full surrender works with this disease.Use this chapter as a guideline

The whole point of this worksheet is to look back and identify and discover in what areas you failed to work your program of recovery. If we don’t learn from our relapses…..and become aware of what not to do again…..we are destined to repeat those same mistakes.

If you are willing to at least look at your thinking, feelings, and behavior that led up to the relapse…..you are moving towards recovery, not away from it.

It is just as important to look at assets, as well as liabilities. We look at what was working as opposed to what didn’t work and identify problem areas. These are the areas we want to bring into our awareness this time….so they won’t slip below the radar again.

In what ways was I actively working my program? (explain/describe, include feelings)
Meetings?
Sponsor?
Steps?
Higher power?
Service?

In what areas did I let my program slide or become complacent? (explain/describe, include feelings)
Meetings?
Sponsor?
Steps?
Higher power?
Service?

In what ways was my life manageable?(explain/describe, include feelings)
Mentally?
Emotionally?
Physically?
Spiritually?

In what ways was my life unmanageable? (explain/describe – be specific, include feelings)
Mentally?
Emotionally?
Physically?
Spiritually?

What events/situations affected my life negatively? (people, places, things, relationships, work)
How did I handle those events? (positive/negative)
What choices (self-will) do I think led me back into unmanageability?
Were these choices well thought out or impulsive reactions? Did you choose by default and ignore the warning signs)
In what ways was I in denial of the direction I was heading?
What circumstances could I have handled differently? In what way?

How was my emotional life unmanageable without the use of drugs? (in what ways – describe feelings and over what).

What were my thinking processes? (describe) Was I lying to myself? Did I justify my actions?

How did my behavior change? In what ways?

In what areas did I lack faith or not use my Higher Powers Guidance?

In what ways did my character defects come into play? (explain/describe all areas)
Denial?
Dishonesty?
Selfishness?
Stealing? Emotional stealing others trust?
Emotional, physical, sexual, financial manipulation of others?
Distrust of self and others?
Resentments? How they affected me and what actions did I take / or not take?
Self reliance/isolation?
Blame? Who did I blame for my feelings and why?
Did I abandon myself?

In what ways did I depend on others to meet my needs?
Where did I not take responsibility for myself and my program?
In what ways did I give my power to others?

Now looking at the answers to all these questions – Identify the problem areas?

List them:

What do I need to work on?
What do I need to watch for? Warning signs? Triggers?

In my best thinking…..How could I actively stay aware and work my program differently this time? (explain/describe).

What active actions can I take to promote my recovery?

How does my behavior need to change?

How will I rely on my Higher power to help me make these changes?

How can I align my will with my Higher powers guidance?

What can I do this time that I did not do last time to ensure a stronger program.

What does a complete surrender mean to me?